Most 1:1s turn into a status update. You run through what you're working on, your manager nods, someone says "anything else?", and you both get 25 minutes of your week back.

That's a waste of the one meeting on your calendar that's actually about you. Status updates can live in Slack. Your 1:1 is where you find out what's really going on, what your manager needs, and what it would take to grow.

These are the questions worth bringing. Not all at once: pick one or two per 1:1 and rotate.

1. "What's one thing I could do to make your job easier?"

It sounds almost too simple, but it tells your manager you're thinking past your own to-do list. You'll also hear what's weighing on them, which is usually the work that gets noticed.

2. "What does great look like in this role six months from now?"

Job descriptions are written once and forgotten. This gets you the real bar, in your manager's words, so you're not guessing what "exceeding expectations" means at review time.

3. "Where am I adding the most value, and the least?"

This is honest calibration without the anxious "am I doing okay?" version. The second half matters most. It's how you find the work you can drop, delegate, or do differently.

4. "What's keeping you up at night right now?"

The fastest way to learn what actually matters to the business this quarter. If you can help with even a piece of it, you've found your next big project.

5. "Is there anything you've heard about my work that I should know?"

Feedback travels. Asking this directly surfaces it while you can still do something about it, instead of the first time you hear it being in your review.

6. "What would you need to see to support me for promotion?"

The one almost nobody asks. It turns a vague hope into a checklist, and it makes your manager say out loud what they're looking for.

It also tells you a lot about your manager. Here's how to read the answer.

What a shitty answer sounds like

• "Just keep doing what you're doing and we'll see." It sounds supportive, but it gives you nothing to aim at.
• "Let's revisit it next cycle." This is a stall. Nothing gets written down, and no date gets set.
• "You need to be more strategic." It's vague, there's no example, and you can't act on it.
• "The budget's tight right now." A company constraint used to dodge the question.
• "I'd need to see you operating at the next level." With no word on what that level looks like or who decides.

What a good answer sounds like

• "Here's what the next level looks like. Let me show you the leveling guide and the expectations that matter most." You get a written standard.
• "Right now I see you strong at X. The gap is Y, and here's what that looks like in practice. For example, owning a cross-team project start to finish." They name the gap and a concrete way to close it.
• "Let's write it down together and check in monthly. I'll tell you honestly if you're on track." Criteria, a timeline, and a regular check.
• "Who else needs to see this work for the case to land? I'll get you in front of them." They sponsor you instead of just approving you.
• "I can't promise the outcome. Calibration and budget are real constraints. But I'll tell you where we stand each time, and if the answer ends up being no, I'll tell you why and what changes it." Honest about what they can't control.

If you get an answer from the first list, don't stop there. Ask the follow-up: "What would that look like in practice? Can we write it down?" Whatever you get back, write it down, and bring it up again every few months.

Make it a habit, not a one-off

• Keep a running doc. Agenda, notes, and follow-ups in one place, so every 1:1 builds on the last one.
• Write down what you both promised. Then do your half before the next one.
• Silence is fine. Ask the question, then let them think. The second answer is usually the honest one.

My free 1:1 template is built for exactly this: an agenda, notes, and follow-ups that carry over week to week.

I'd start with number 6. Tell me which one you're bringing to your next 1:1 →